As a former Sgt Major in the Seaforth Highlanders, Torquila is well used to giving orders, such as ‘appear on parade with grubby boots again, corporal Simpkin, and you’ll be paring spuds with a nail-file until doomsday.’ Force marches herself to work every morning from Scunthorpe (but takes the bus home). A lady with a mission. And that mission is to fulfil your order.
These weirdly fabulous bunch stand ready to assist in your bodily functions of excretion and ablution. Simply put, they make sure you never run out of Uranus Wiper toilet roll in your home.
They also help us strive towards our Big Hairy Audacious Goals of keeping Earth and Uranus clean
You can get in touch with any of the Grooms of the Stool via firstname.lastname@example.org